Silent Pain

After our first kiss, Timmy and I never spent one day without seeing one another.  I became very ill with mono, and was hospitalized for five days. He drove his parents' car, a Ford LTD, every evening, to see me at the hospital. There's no way his old truck would have made the thirty minute drive and back.  My biggest fear was him seeing me look so bad. I couldn't do my hair or make-up, and I just looked sick.  That didn't seem to bother him.  Every time he got ready to go home, he'd give me a kiss. To this day, I don't know how I got mono. Timmy never indicated any symptoms, and God knows he and I had kissed an awful lot lately.

In August of 1984, we'd been dating for only five months, but our love was already so strong, we couldn't bare spending even one day without seeing one another. My parents went to Colorodo, camping like we had done for years.  With me only being fifteen and having a boyfriend, whom I was obviously crazy about, there was no way my parents were going to allow me to stay home, even with my older brother still at home.  It was absolutely terrible! We missed each other so much!  I actuall took change from my Mama's purse, just to call Timmy at the campgrounds where we stayed.  Mama never said anything, but I think she knew it.

Timmy and I knew we would get married someday.  It was just a known fact. There really wasn't some romantic proposal. We even went together to choose and purchase my bridal ring set. Twenty-five years later, we both wear the same rings. I never want anything more.

When I was sixteen, Timmy went to my parents' house, and asked my parents' for permission for us to get married. Timmy told them that we had set a date for October 17, which was eleven months away.  My parents agreed, after my Daddy gave him a long lecture.  I was working at Dairy Queen at the time.  Timmy had fortunately landed a job at Coca-Cola, delivering sodas.  He made "okay" money, but had full benefits.

I skipped my Junior year in high school, so we could get married. I had enough credits to do so.
I had a teacher, Mr.Lawson, who pleaded with me not to do this.  He wanted me to continue with high school, take Senior English, and become a English teacher.  He thought I was making a huge mistake. I was in love, engaged, and ready to get married, so I didn't listen to his advise. I don't regret not listening to him. However, I know he was just trying to give direction to one of his favorite students.

Just before my Senior year began, there was a terrible car accident. One of my best friend's sister, Terri Garner, was spending the night with our nearest neighbors, Kim Cozby.  They escaped through Kim's bedroom window, and met two boys in a car. (Sounds familiar, huh?). They drove for about 3/4 mile toward town (We lived on a dead-end road), and ran a stop sign.  Both of the girls, whom I knew well, perished in that awful accident. My friend Mike, who's sister was one of the two killed, called me in the middle of the night, as he frequently did.  He told me that Terri was dead.  With permission, I drove to Mike's house, where he lived with his grandparents.  We sat in Terri's room for hours, talking and crying. He already had her Senior ring. She was to be a Senior that following year.  Mike was wearing the ring on his little finger. When he was eight years-old, his father committed suicide, and soon after, Mike's mother was sent to a mental hospital out of state.  She had lived there for years. Mike  and his sister went to live with thier grandparents, who were Southern Baptist and very strict on the two children.  Mike had often told me that his siter was really all that he had.  A horrific accident took her away from, too!  I don't know where Mike is today.  I've only seen hm a couple of times, since we've been out of school. However, when I have seen him, he still has his sister's senior ring on his little finger.

I know it sounds "nerdy", but I was a member of the school choir during junior high and most of high school.  Since I could play the piano better than our instructor, she often asked me to play during practice. Wow!  Did I think I was special?  Most of the other students didn't even know that I could play piano. I met many good friends during Choir.  My closest choir buddy was Bobby Radke. I haven't seen him since high school and don't know where's living, what he's doing, etc.

I wasn't exactly an angel during my senior year of high school.  Timmy had graduated, and was working for Coke. Once they knew Ken had moved away,  I had Black guys all over me, even though I had a steady White" boyfriend, whom I was planning to marry.  During Social Studies class, Sam James, a major player on our football team and a Senior, dropped me a note, asking me to go out with him. Sam James!  Gosh!  I couldn't believe Sam James wanted to go out with little, nobody, unpopular me. I wrote back, and told him that I couldn't.

One of my Senior Photos 1984

Preston King was another senior. He was also Black and came from a fine, upstanding family.  His father was a minister.  Preston played drums in the band and was very popular.  I got to know him back when Ken was still here, and we were always friends.  However, my senior year was different. Somewhere, somehow Preston and I developed a "crush" on one another. We were always together at school.  he walked me to all of my classes and carried my books.  We never held hands, etc. I was already engaged!   I knew where Preston lived, so one day I stopped by (in my 1979 Mercury Zephyer). Preston came out.  We talked for a few minutes. I couldn't let anyone see my car at a King's house. We told each other "good-bye", and then HE KISSED ME! That was the only time that Preston and I kissed. We contined on at school, as if nothing had happened.   That very night, I broke down, and told Timmy what had happened!  He was going to leave (we were at my house), but I begged and pleated for him to stay. I just kept appologizing. This will become a pattern for the remainder of my life, and every time, Timmy stayed with me. To this day, I don't know why he did.